i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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