you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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