I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
