sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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