I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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