i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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