stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
