We're facebook friends in real life
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
