I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
It's Friday. Sex?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
