This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
