Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize