So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
whose ass print is on the piano?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
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