WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
