Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
