I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize