Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
