hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Blood and glitter go together right?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
