If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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