my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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