He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
