Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
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