I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
