Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
