Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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