its not stalking. its research.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
