She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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