But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
