I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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