dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
