I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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