why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
