garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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