Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
