David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
