It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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