let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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