i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
