thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize