called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
