i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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