I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
