Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize
