We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
