belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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