no, he came in my armpit
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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