he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize