Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
