I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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