you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
