Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
where am i from again
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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