Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I hope mine doesn't look like that
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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