So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
